My how you've changed...

Holy, things seem so different to me now. I'm mentally making grocery lists, and lists of things to fix and clean and make. And of course the infamous husband list...it's a list of things you really don't want on your list. That you figure eventually you'll get around to getting him to do them. The only thing is, it usually takes more effort to get husband to do the list you give him, then if you did it yourself. It never ceases to amaze me all the things that I want done, that I just don't want to take on myself. For example, there is this old, broken down entertainment center taking up valuable space in my bedroom. And considering that we live in a one bedroom apartment, space is...coveted. I told husband I wanted him to break it apart and take it to the dumpster, that was back in January, it is now April. I will admit that one day I decided to take it on myself, and I whacked at it with a hammer for about ten minutes. I only got one piece off, which did go to the dumpster. But then I realized that if I kept banging on it with the hammer, eventually it would collapse and probably on me. That's why it was a husband job. See, if I had gotten it apart and carted to the dumpster I'd hear,"Well I would have done it hunny, you didn't have to do all that." And if I had injured myself it would have gone something like this,"Why didn't you just wait for me to do it? All you had to do was ask." *chuckle* oh the irony. He forgets, I did ask, and I have waited, and yet...it's still taking up that space. So, there's my wife thought for the week.

So the change part! I remember the days, not so long ago when I was very different. I wouldn't say care free, just very different cares. My thoughts centered around where I wanted to go with which friend, and when I would have more money to spend on frivilous things like clothes. I spent most of my time just having fun really. And I'll admit I have fun now, but it's different. It's...responsible fun. Now I plan an afternoon with a friend a week or more in advance, which usually gets cancelled due to "husband needs this" or "got extra work" or "Whopper of a headache". And I suppose thats part of being a unit, a family. I don't know yet, how I feel about the title of house wife, when it doesn't include that of Mother. But this little family of mine is pretty wonderful.

All those things I do now, that I didn't even think about being involved in married life, I love. I'm very different from how I thought I'd be, but I'm more complete then I've ever been. Of course life isn't perfect. Like the fact that when I go to buy the groceries I have to push the shopping cart down several blocks to our apartment. The wheels screeching and bouncing the whole way, not my favorite thing ever. But it's a strange sort of little fulfillment, an accomplishment all my own.

I still have big dreams, and I know someday I'll be chasing them down just as determined and bullheaded as ever. I think now though, I'll be appreciating the little things along the way.

P.s. I am chasing one dream, and I'm sure all women have it at one point or another. To be thinner, or smaller, or skinny, how ever you want to put it. But bottom line, I'm a woman with a mission. I have a goal, a plan, and it's working! And I am so excited! My goal is to lose a grand total of at least 68.2 pounds, 5 down, 63.2 to go! I'm going to be healthy.........and wise. !